Mav (chrismaverick) wrote,

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on the capture of bloodthirsty deposed tyrants...

So, apparently Saddam Hussein has been captured. With minimal resistance and no shots fired apparently. They walked into his cave, found this unkempt, homeless looking guy with a long beard who hadn't bathed in weeks and said "excuse me sir, are you Saddam Hussein?" and he said "yup..." and they said "could you kindly put on these handcuffs and come with us?" and he said "sure, no problem..." and then they said "Mr. Bush will be flying in directly to repeatedly rape you up the ass if that's ok with you." and he said "sounds like a party!"

What the fuck?

You know, I remember during the other Iraqi war when Bush I, would compare Hussein to Hitler, and I was kinda like "hmmm, that seems like kinda an overstatement, but ok, I see his point." But now, like, what the fuck? You know, at least Hitler had the good sense to put a bullet in his own skull and burn his body beyond recognition so that his legend could live on, and there'd be mystery as to whether he had died or not even 50 years later. I mean, come on... mysterious death... its not that hard... Hitler, Elvis, Tupac. Saddam, you could have been a contender.

Now we've got people on Meet the Press talking about what to do with him. Popular belief is that he is gonna be turned over to the Iraqis for trial. For what? At least the US could try him for crimes against humanity or something. But what can Iraq fairly try him for? I mean sure, they could just kill him because he's an evil mass murdering bastich, but technically he was an evil mass murdering bastich who was the sovereign ruler of his nation at the time. Sure, he was an ass, but technically he didn't break any Iraqi laws.

So now we have the interesting political fallout in our countries presidential race. Particularly the democratic nomination. Up until a few hours ago, Howard Dean was the clear front runner for the democratic nomination. But as Tim Russert and Tom Brokaw pointed out this morning, he did that largely on the "war is bad" platform, going so far as to make the statement last week "this administration hasn't even been able to catch Saddam Hussein" and that's gone now. They actually had Joe Lieberman on this morning and he had the nerve to actually say "with all due respect, lets face facts, there are only two serious candidates for this upcoming election, Howard Dean and myself." He went on to talk about how the American people needed a president who was willing to fight the war on terrorism and Dean isn't willing to do that, so elect him.

Ok, Joe, dude... if you're reading this, and like I'm sure you are (as sure as you are that you and Dean are the only serious presidential candidates for 2004), with all due respect, lets face facts... first of all, no offense, but you're awfully jewish. Not that there's anything wrong with being jewish... its just that the country is still pretty fucked up, and there are a lot of people who are simply going to vote against you just because... well you're awfully jewish. You know... sort of like the way that people would vote against me because I am so clearly a chinaman. Second, ummm... well you keep forgetting that the guy who's there now is pretty much willing to fight that war. You know, I have my own personal problems with Lieberman regarding his stances on media censorship, but really, I mean, to me his candidacy seems to mostly consist of "vote for me because I'm just as good as Bush, but I have this here I'm a Democrat bumper sticker."

Fuck it... I'm voting for Sharpton...

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