February 28th, 2005

GQ

more on pretty boys... (and girls too, this time)

Ok, I totally don't get this. I'm being serious this time. I know I bitch about "cute" guys from time to time, and how they aren't really all that hot. And I pick on Depp in particular, mostly because I know how much beststephi and other readers like him. But really, beststephi is willing to leave me for this idiot? I mean I totally don't get it. He looks like a fucking serial killer. I mean, to each their own, really. I know for instance that as far as "popular" beauties go, I'd totally do Britney, and yet I wouldn't give Angelina a second look. A lot of people seem to think Paris Hilton is attractive, but if I met her in a bar, I'd totally think she was Nicole Ritchie's somewhat less attractive friend, that is just there to block lame guys who are trying to hit on Nicole. I mean she's totally a mission for the wingman. I mean, don't get me wrong. Once you get to know her, then you find out she's not too bright a girl who has a whole lot of money and likes to get drunk and suck cock on camera (thanx, suicideking), so she's like a total catch. But if I had no idea who she was, I'd never give her a second look.

But Depp? I'm sorry, I just don't get it. I mean, I sort of get young Depp. If a girl is into the Jumpstreet/90210 pretty boy thing, then fine. I still think Grieco was better. But whatever. But old Depp? It's like he's trying to look like crap. Especially last night.

At least, with guys, I get it. I mean we're pigs. Pamela Anderson isn't exactly my type. But she has huge tits, blonde hair, a tiny waist, and again, a penchant for having sex on camera. Oh, and she's rich. So, again, I get it. I can point to her, and say "damn, she looks like a porn star. I see why guys want to fuck her." Lately, when I look at Depp, I say, "damn, he looks like the kinda guy who if you got involved with him, he might chop you up into little bits and bury you in the garden." I mean, he even made a movie about it. So really, in all seriousness, what is it?
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